My heart is full, heavy and packed with disappointments. The dark clouds, dense and ready to pour ponderous rain for it can't hold the weight anymore. Just like my heart, dismal and glutted with frustrations. Unable to seize this much oppression. My eyes: ready to emit chief amount of tears but my mind strongly opposes to what my heart covets. All these impediments cause my smile to turn upside down; my laughter into hush. It feels like I'm the biggest disenchantment of myself and of other people as well. I'm trying to shroud the genuine feelings I have so people won't dispute what's going on; what I'm actually going through. Because I don't know how to explain, to express myself; and to make them understand. As I sit here, writing this, I wonder how will I tell the people around me the truth. Will they be able to comprehend? Should I open up to them or should I just keep this to myself? Maybe, just maybe, I can just decode things on my own. Maybe these things in my heart will flow out of my system together with the tears I brace inside me; once I drench them. Perhaps, keeping it inside would help other people to feel better for they wouldn't know what I perceive and hold inside. Things will get better, it may be stormy in my life now but, like what they always say; it can't rain forever. All I have to do is trust Him and do my best to stay smiling. As much as possible, be radiant despite everything.
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