Okay Lang Ako.

Smiling as if nothing's wrong. I'm trying to convince everyone that I'm fine maybe because that's what I want to be.

Hey, it's the 30th again. It's been two months since I heard what I really wanted to hear from you.

I told myself I won't miss you. That I'll be okay. But who am I kidding? A day without you sending me a text message makes me paranoid. I know, I'm stupid. I'm childish. I'm sorry for being this way. For being clingy and all.

November 30, 2011 have 24 hours. I hope I'll receive even just a single message from you. I'm worried. I can't help myself from worrying. My mind is blank...

I can't think of anything anymore.

I'm fine, that's what I tell people not because I'm fine but because I'm hoping that's what I would be.

Kundiman.

To make up for my emo post, here is the lyrics of the song that I find really sweet and touching.

You can search for it and listen to it if you want.

Kundiman-Silent Sanctuary

Para kang asukalSintamis mong magmahalPara kang PinturaBuhay ko ikaw ang nagpintaPara kang unanPinapainit mo ang aking tiyanPara kang kumotNa yumayakap sa tuwing ako'y nalulungkot
Refrain:Kaya't wag magtatakaKung bakit ayaw kitang mawala
Chorus:Kung hindi man tayo hanggang duloWag mong kalimutannandito lang akolaging umaalalayDahil ang taning panalangin ko ay ikaw
II.Di baleng maghapon na umulanBasta't ikaw ang sasandalan liwanagNg lumulubog na arawkay sarap pagmasdanLalo na kapag nasisinagan ang iyong mukhaAyoko nang magsawahinding hindi magsasawa sa iyo(REPEAT REFRAIN AND CHORUS)
Bridge:Bahala na ayoko muna magsalitahayaan na muna natinang hatol ng tadhana(REPEAT CHORUS)Dahil ang tanging panalangin,Dahil ang tangin panalanigin ko ay ikaw

Credits to: www.metrolyrics.com

I just really like this. It explains everything. Just everything.

Iloveyou.

I Must Be Paranoid.

Maybe I'm over thinking. Or maybe I'm just overreacting. I don't know.
But I know something's changed.

Something I never thought would happen.. or at least I never wanted to happen.
Could it be? You're getting tired of me? Of us?
How could I say us if there was never us. Just You and Me but no Us.

I'm happy, I really am. To be finally loved by you. But I'm getting tired.

No more "I love you's". A small thing but definitely made me think about it all this time.
You can't blame me. You're far and your I love you's are my only assurance. But now it's gone. No more I love you's when I need it. Or even in random moments.

I don't know.. I can't think of anything anymore.


I'll be better someday. Or at least I hope.


Please don't mind this post. I just need to get this out.

Random Cheesy-ness.

-- out of nowhere --
Him: Ikaw lang :D
Ako: Ako lang ang? :))
Him: MAHAL KO.


-- random messages like this makes me smile like an idiot for a minute or two. Oh wait lemme correct that, messages like this from him. :)

RANT

Facebook. It's actually giving us less privacy. But that's not my point.
Location is stated in someone's profile, right? Why not read? Why bother ask if it's already there and all you have to do is read.
Another thing, you ask a person for their number and they don't give it-- why force them? It's their number and they have the final decision if they're gonna give it to you or not. If they do, lucky for you, if they don't, then accept it. Don't force them.
Then this is what really, and I mean really bothers me.
I log in, I have friend request, I accept it, you message me and ask me who I am. Lemme get this straight, you added me. I should be the one to ask you, right?


Lemme rant about these things for a while. Kbye.

Nobody Else

I feel so loaded and stressed but guess what? I ain't even doing anything. I'm too lazy, okay?

So... I guess you got curious with the title, right?
Well the truth is, I've been loaded with work the past weeks and I need to relax.
You know what relaxes me? Oh wait, it's more of a who. Yup, it's him.
His morning text messages and his corny jokes-- all those things relax me.


Our endless conversations that start at like 5am and ends at 11pm. Sometimes, it somehow feels that 24 hours isn't enough for us to talk about anything. Just anything.
And this is what I like best about him. I can be myself when I'm with him. No need to pretend or hide the real me.
The fact that I can tell him just anything, anything at all and feel comfortable with it.

So. Why Nobody Else?

Simply because nobody else makes me feel this way. Corny, yes, but it's true.
It's gonna be really hard for me to let go if ever.
But right now, all I know is I'm happy and contented.

RGE. <3

Strangers In Love Part Four

"WHAT TIME IS IT?!" Nico said as he woke up and rushed to the CR when he realized he was late.

"Good morning! :)" was the text message he sent to Sophia even though he was in a rush.

5 minutes later, there was no reply. He thought maybe Sophia's busy so he just went on his way.

Nico arrived school. Excited to see Sophia, he rushed into the hallway. With his fingers crossed, he hoped he could bump into her again. He went in and was disappointed. Sophia wasn't there. His crossed fingers failed him once again. Thinking maybe Sophia was just late, he continued to walk with this head down.

7:50am and Sophia wasn't there yet. Everyone got finished with the assembly and went to their rooms. He glanced at the Third Year room, thinking Sophia's there but she wasn't.

Homeroom time. Everyone was so busy chatting with each other. He took his phone out, hoping Sophia had replied already. She did. He read it, "Hey, good morning! I'm sorry, I can't attend school today. I'm sick. :("

Disappointed and sad, that's how Nico felt. The teacher went in so he hid his phone.

Time went by, Sophia was still on his mind. No one else was. Only Sophia.

It was break time when he decided to text Sophia a get-well-soon message.

He went to the cafeteria to buy something to eat for he was hungry, realizing he didn't take his breakfast.

When he went to the cafeteria, he saw Sophia's favorite food, Hello Panda. He bought two, one for him and one for Sophia.

He went upstairs and sneaked into the Third Year classroom. Luckily, no one was there. He placed the Hello Panda under Sophia's desk with a note on it saying "I hope you'll feel better :)"

Worried that someone might see him, he left the room and went directly to their room like nothing happened.

He sat on his chair, eating the Hello Panda. "I hope she'll be here tomorrow", Nico thought to himself.

TO BE CONTINUED.

Sorry it took a long time for this part to be posted! Sorry it's not that good. :(

Uh, Vacation?

This doesn't feel like a vacation.

Anyway, I'm in Manila with my Mom and one of my best friends, Erika.

It's Halloween and I think our faces fit the season! HAHAHA.

September, October and Finally November! Lots of crazy stuff happened the past months. The whole 2011 was surprising. I just can't believe the things I'm experiencing.

Well, like being loved by the person whom I've liked for more than a year now and I've loved for how many months. (Okay this sounds corny but you know)

Having high grades in my quarterly exams.

And a whole lot more. Most of the things, if not everything, are actually going the way I want them to and it feels awesome.

Anyway, this girl right here, is Erika. I've been best friends with girl for how many years now. I don't know how, when and why we became best friends. Seriously. I just love her and I enjoy her company.

And.. about the guy I love. Well, we've been friends for quite some time now. I met him last year, July 24th. We became close when we started texting each other, April 24th of this year. Neither of us ever thought we'd actually fall in love with each other. Well, I was the first one. I fell in love with him maybe May or June but I never thought he'd actually feel the same. (Okay, this is really corny but you know, everyone becomes corny when it comes to love).

Thinking he'd never feel the same, I wanted to give up. I mean, what's the point, right? But of course, as a friend, I was always there for him especially when no one else was.

The night of September 30 came. When I least expected it, he told me he loves me. I was stunned. Speechless. I didn't know what to say since I was about to give up on him. He had the right timing and I couldn't be happier.

It's been a month and 2 days but he still loves me. I just hope this time, I wouldn't get my heart broken like the last time.

True love can wait, right? Though you're far, I know you love me. That's what you said and I believe you.